now… there are too many things in this world that make me glad to be alive (God, J.Lo, family, y’kno, the normal stuff), but here’s a random 15 off the top of my head…


1. Taking a piss after you’ve held it in for a long period of time. Y’kno what I’m talkin about, right? The piss where you close your eyes and just… eject. Where it feels like a piece of your soul is escaping along with the flow and a gentle, tingling sensation travels throughout your veins. You may shiver, and if you do, oh even better. And at the end of your business, you just stand there for a couple more seconds just to savor the beauty of the moment.


2. The moment in which you press the “off” button on your annoying ass alarm clock, and realize that you have no class. Damn, going back to sleep in the morning… what a gift. And being in a fetal position and woven inside a warm comforter on a freezing (preferrably rainy) day. It don’t get much better than that.


3. Laying the nastiest fart in the world… but having someone else get accused.


4. The feeling you get after a police officer passes you up after he’s been tailing you for a block or so. And then you start acting all tough, like: “that’s right, pig… that’s what i thought bizzzatch!” And once he comes back behind you, it’s back to 10-2 on the steering wheel.


5. Meeting up with old friends, and realizing that nothing’s changed. That those things you heard about everybody splitting up in college are false, and that although everyone’s individually a little more mature and different — when you all reunite, it’s like nothing’s changed.


6. When you look in the mirror, and for that one split second, at that one certain angle, under that one specific lighting arrangement — you actually look a lil’ buffer.


7. The electric shaver against my head when I’m getting a fade. Not really the big one, but the smaller one when the barber is doing the finishing touchups. I dunno if it’s cuz of the vibration, but it always makes me wanna sleep. And when the barber is washing and shampooing my hair for me, and I get to lay back and just close my eyes and dream of jennifer lopez.


8. Walking out of a final, and knowing that you aced that ish. Or gettin’ the results of a final, and finding out that you did much better than you thought. Or gettin’ a crappy ass score, but finding out that the class mean was even lower.


9. Watchin’ a scary ass movie and gettin’ scared the hell outta you. Or gettin’ told a scary story and gettin’ goosebumps all over… (yeah, until… you have to go take a shower, and you’re screaming in pain ‘cuz the shampoo is all in your eyes ‘cuz you’re too scared to close them, thinking that a ghost will appear if you close them). But yeah, the feeling after something really scary happens in the movie, and you scream and jump for your life, and then you just sit there laughing in relief.


10. Sushi. ‘Nuff said. (especially Spicy Dynamite Mac)


11. When your favorite jam starts to play in the club. And do you notice how it always comes on right before you’re about to leave to go sit down or something, and then you say: “oh hell yeah, this is my song!!” and then you work your way back to the middle of the dance floor.


12. Laughing so hard that you’re trying so hard to breathe. Where there’s no more sound, and afterwards, you feel like you jus ran a mile. Those are rare, but worth it.


13. Nice, obese, middle-aged black women. They have got to be the greatest people on earth. No matter who you are, where you’re from, or how you’re feeling… them ladies will make you smile.


14. The big “O” when you y’kno. Uhh… i’m talkin about ocean sounds when you are laying on the sand during sunset.


15. The feeling you get after you go all out and cuss the hell out of someone that is so deserving of gettin cussed out. After you’ve said all the right words, and said everything you wanted to say, to the point where they’re just silent and thinking of something to say, but they can’t ‘cuz you basically pimp-slapped them speechless. Victory. (Or you can take the high road, but… what’s the fun in that?) That’s right, stfu.


As a wise woman named Da Brat once asked:
so… “what ‘chu like?

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~ by roychi on February 19, 2003.

9 Responses to “”

  1. about number 9…gay how john wouldnt tell us any stories that one night when we came down to ucla.  you whined like a bitch for him to traumitize you. he straight ignored your ass hahaha.

  2. hey wassup…haven’t seen u in LONG ass time.  Nice 15. If I were a guy, I’d agree with u.

  3. #13 is so true. 

  4. roy … can u be any gayer? 1 eProp … 4 jew

  5. roy screams in the shower….. he doesnt yell or make loud noises…. he screams…

  6. That black woman looks kinda like you Roy….I think its all the flabby ripples under her chin that gives it away. That means you lied in #6. Stop being a liar.

  7. HAHAHAHAHA! ohhh my roy chi. i heard how you murdered my scary stories. anyways, you know when i’m happiest? #1: when you’re taking a ddong and you know that lil piece that wont freakin cut!! you shake your butt from side to side, do funny contractions… and then all of a sudden it goes “bloop” and it ALL comes out!!! #2: RIGHT before you fall asleep knowing you don’t have to wake up at any particular time. you just kinda go “ahhh…” 😀

  8. haha yOu write sOme funny ass sh*t!!!  sOme was kinda grOss..but the sh*t was funny! 

  9. don’t worry roy. I liked your xanga entry. it was tight,

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