A message for you all to realize / That everything that breathes eventually dies / And at times it’s hard to let that sink in / ‘Cuz we always do what we want when we should be thinkin’…


I’m gonna start my writing with this / A little incidence, no coincidence, where I was overcome with this thing called insolence / Tryin’ a be tough tryin’ a keep my cool up / Brush away my problems with a vengeful touch / See, I didn’t understand that it wasn’t about pride / Something that I always found myself tryin’a deny / And I, played my cards like a poker game / Where competitive blood ran through my veins / And the truth is / I never lose it / The game, I mean, or so I thought / And at the end of the game I found MYSELF LOST / You see, for every Royal Flush that I had / It represented all the times when I was straight up, pissed off, crossed up, steamin’, schemin’, hate-the-world feelin’, screw you, you too, don’t tell me what I should do, no comfort, love or any good… no, great… things in my life MAD. And I thought I had won. Fists clenched up, face wrenched up, I then stood up, with arms in the sky / I felt like Rocky, ‘cept much more cocky, and I felt like a Wright when they first saw it fly / That’s right biotch, you hear the fire in my sound? / I didn’t come so far to get knocked out in the first round. But what I didn’t see, was that in front of me, that was the true winner / And I didn’t understand that I was just a beginner / In this REAL game called life. And everytime I felt like I was hopeless and joyless, that the world’s crumbling down, as cliche as that sounds, it seemed like I could only find my source of happiness in hate. And when I tried to escape / from this sinful fate / I realized that it was way too late / And that all I could do then was wait. And so I waited. And waited. And waited.

But then i hated the wait and I hated the sound of people talking behind my back / The neverending echo of THEIR hateful attack / And that’s when it hit me. For every “winning” card that I was dealt, it was slowly eroding the once-pure of something that was truly heartfelt / Something so great that it could make hatred melt / It protected you everytime someone cussed you out, or your parents yelled, or when you got hit with a belt / It saved your life everytime that cold blade was freezing your wrist / And gave you that strength everytime you were dissed / It gave you support, game-winning assists, it made sure you always smiled, and that you were always missed. But it was too late. The cycle began / when I was dealt my first hand / and instead of letting my friends and family win / I took my royal flush and I chose to sin. I affected all those around me / the love that surrounds me / and I couldn’t stop the force / no matter much I tried to run it off course.

And then with my head tilted back, and my knees relaxed, I opened my heart.

The pain was so strong / ‘Cuz it had been so long / Since I’d confessed myself wrong / And the sin and the hate and the fear started to pour / Gritting my teeth I never felt this before / And then a hand touched my soul and it mended the hole / And it cleaned all the scars that my hatred tore. It was then that I began / To understand / And I proclaimed His name and my Savior came / and He dealt me a brand new hand. With a royal flush in front of my eye / I put down my cards with a gleeful cry / “I fold.” / And my friend with a pair of nines, won the prize.



~ by roychi on November 15, 2002.

7 Responses to “”

  1. royyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i likesssssssssssssssssssssss =D i am here in your room right now. i feel gay writing a message to you when you’re right here. if you would stop LOOKING at the freakin SCREEN!!!! geez roy geez. GEEZ! ha. ok. you inspire me. i wish i had a talent in expressing myself verbally… and that it sounded nice. okies. enough about you. lets talk about me. im pretty sexy no? ;D

  2. hey yo…roy i am impRESSED!!! how long does it take you to write these things..i tried to write some lines after 8 mile and i realized that i cant. HA! but yeah…dan is impressed too.

  3. yeah yeah great job. haha j/k =)

  4. dude. are you going to be our next JIN?? hmm.. well it sounds good on paper, how about when you put it to verse? anyhow.. just wanted to say hi. i havent seen you in a while! bye =]

  5. Word.
    Hit up my page and do a haiku, yo. Thanks.

  6. hey roy~
    of COURSE i remember u =) wow… didnt kno u had so much talent ^^ how r u doing? good i hope… take care of urself~!

  7. hey roy we haven’t talked in a long time so i just wanted to see how you were doing well hope your taking care byee

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